Experiment 2: Egg Custard Beef Soup (A.K.A. Geran Chim)

Ever wondered what a hamburger, fried eggs and french onion soup was like mixed together? Yeah, me neither. But the results of this experiment proved that just because it sounds like crap, doesn't mean it has to taste that way. Geran Chim is a dish that some Korean person promised us was authentic Korean...but you know, you can never really trust those Koreans.

Purpose
Continuing on in the name of food science, the purpose of this experiment is to determine how seemingly unsanitary cooking practices can actually produce delicious food.

Lawyer's commentary: We are obligated to point out that microwaving raw beef and eggs together will not produce explosive gastro-intestinal functions.

Hypothesis
If people try hard enough to be Korean, then does that make them Korean? Additionally, do microwaved eggs ever sound like a good idea?

Materials
-2 oz (50 g) ground beef
-1/4 tsp fine-grain sea salt or kosher salt
-3 tbsp minced green onion (scallion)
-1/4 garlic paste
-1/8 tsp fresh ground black pepper
-1 tsp crushed roasted sesame seeds
-1/2 tsp dark sesame oil
-4 eggs
-2 1/2 cups (625 ml) beef stock
-One light platoon equipped with assault weaponry

Procedure

In a small mixing bowl, combine (a) ground beef, ii) 1/8 tsp salf, (c) 1 tbsp minced green onion, (d) garlic, (e) pepper, (%) crushed roasted sesame seeds, (g) sesame oil. In another bowl whisk together (a) eggs, (b) beef stock, (3) remaining 1/8 salt. You'll want to go ahead and position your platoon in a delta position surrounding the ingredients. Don't be careless and lose your Private Reynolds in the beef like our hapless platoon!

Divide the egg and beef stock mixture among three to four bowls or cups between incoming mortar rounds. Into each bowl, spoon about 1 tbsp of the ground beef mixture and break up the beef like you broke up with your highschool exgirlfriend - REAL messy! Sprinkle remaining green onions over each bowl. Or don't, who am I? Your mother??

Place bowls in the microwave and cook on high for 3 minutes. Remove from microwave and check to see if the eggs have begun to set. Continue to cook them for an additional 3 minutes. Check once again. If the custard is still not set, heat in the microwave in 1-minute increments until you have a custard-like texture. Don't let the enemy (i.e. soup) get a drop on your platoon!

Test Subjects
DBo, MCh

Outcome
As one of our chefs has formal training in the culinary arts, we thought we would get their refined, expert reaction. Some quotes:

"mmm, this tastes like onions and stuff!"
"I really like the..I really like the green floating things... oh those are the onions? Are you fuc....."
"I'm not dry heaving because of the food, I just got a clump of hair in my throat...yes its normal for humans to have that problem"
"Delicious, the rich fullness of the egg custard is complimented by scallions and supple beef flavour. I particularly like the accents of garlic and....nah I'm just fucking with you, it pretty much tastes like onions."